Capability and NDIS Coaching

Do you want your chosen role in life to better suit your strengths, values and ambitions? Your job description (role) does not define you. Take charge. Of your life.

My Role Models

I have had the privilege of working with three incredible women in delivering NDIS services. The first is passionate, funny, clever, athletic, courageous and kind. By the way she has an acquired brain injury with associated serious epileptic episodes. But she does not allow this to define her.

When we first met, let's call her Elizabeth, could not speak in more than one or two words. And even then it was a struggle to understand one another. We still communicate in short hand with many special words being identified by their first or only several letters. For example PL for police. We learnt that it is not necessary to communicate only in words. We humans have a lot more choices than this.

Elizabeth has turned this into a game, a cognitive test for her carers, supporters, family and friends. It is playful, enjoyable and keeps us all on our toes! It also lets us know how she is feeling.

Beside her side, for the whole time has been her amazing personal care team, led by an empathic, kind, generous, clever woman, Tania. Tania and I work closely together to build strength and resilience for us all. All of the other members of the care team are likewise very dedicated as is the management team.

And the third woman is my neighbour and horse riding buddy Bin, who is a teacher with special education qualifications and extensive horse handling and riding experience. When I lost my NDIS horse Sterling in a tragic float accident Bin stepped in to offer Desi as Elizabeth's riding horse. One of the highlights of my working life was walking either side of Elizabeth, with Bin, as Elizabeth took over the reins to ride Desi.

Bin and I have shared many hours together riding and caring for our horses, celebrating our successes and supporting one another when things have gone wrong. As they do.

Have You Been Kind to the Horses this Week?

We first met because Elizabeth wanted to come and meet my horses and achieve an audacious "hairy" goal - to ride a horse again, after a 30 year hiatus and the addition of a brain injury.

I ran a small Equine Experiential Education business delivering services to individual NDIS clients. Covid interrupted our start date but we finally met and have been meeting every two weeks ever since. Rock solid. Except for the odd emergency, holiday or illness.

This question - have you been kind to the horses - first arose when one day we were feeding the horses some carrots at the end of the session and I had forgotten that I had one in my pocket. Skye nibbled my back pocket and I swished her nose away with my hand. Elizabeth did not consider this to be a kind act. And it was not.

Ever since, ever fortnight I am asked the question. And every day of every week of every year since I ask myself the question - am I being kind to my horses? This is my benchmark.

Feel Smarter Think Kinder

The development of the Core EQ Strategy, Smarter Kinder was an iterative process that emerged from my interactions and learnings from Bin, Elizabeth and Tania.

When we met I had already developed the idea of Smarter Feeling as a way of understanding how to become smarter in how we tune into our emotions. This is very important when handling and living with large 500 kilo animals. Horses are not aggressive, rather the opposite. However their sheer size becomes an issue if they get a fright or become obstinate or energetic. And we can get hurt, or they can, if we are not tuned in sufficiently in the moment. For example if we are preoccupied with thinking about something else, i.e. not present in the moment we risk missing an important cue such as a horse's ears moving back against their poll. Feel smarter. Allow your senses to pick up subtle cues.

The missing piece of the puzzle was Think Kinder - kinder thinking. When we are using the logical part of our brain and allowing negative thoughts, or fear to overwhelm our thinking we can become separated from our physical self in the moment. And not give ourselves permission to be truly present. This is a simple proposition however it can be very important if we are the type of person who allows negative self talk to overwhelm us. This is unkind thinking towards our self and can lead to unexpected consequences when we are handling or riding a horse.

What Elizabeth and my horses have taught me is that it is always important to be thinking and feeling in sinc. When we isolate our thinking we risk making unkind decisions and on occasions, unsafe decisions. I explore this issue in greater detail in other articles in the Blog Section "Smarter Kinder".

If we hold onto our humanity with Smarter Kinder EQ behaviour we, and those around us, will be safer and happier if we demonstrate:

Acceptance

Grace

Trust

Humour

Kindness

Smartness.

Taking the Reins

About 12 months of preparation after setting her courageous goal - to ride a horse again, Elizabeth stepped up onto the yellow mounting block, with Bin and I on either side, safely lifted her right leg over the saddle and eased gently onto the saddle and Desi's back, as all good riders do.

After a brief time of being led Elizabeth announced that she did not need to be led and that she could take charge, take the reins and ride Desi by herself. This she did very competently and safely.

Since then Elizabeth has stepped up and taken the reins to be in charge of her own life on many more occasions. And recently with the appropriate support was able to communicate her wishes about her current care team. This year she is working on another audacious project - watch this space.

Disability is a misnomer

In my opinion the notion of disability is a misnomer. Because in our own unique ways none of us operate at our full able self. This is not to say that people with cognitive or physical disabilities should not be supported by those who are more able. But this ability has a lot more to do with the way our society functions rather than the disability of the person requiring the support.

The Equine (EQ) Link

Equine Experiential Education programs can significantly assist people to tap into their personal and professional development by guiding them in how to draw on their unique strengths and attributes. Equine assisted Team building, Trust and Leadership exercises can enhance this work.

Dr Deb Hann

24 March 2024