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Realistic Optimism
Many motivational speakers and self-improvement books have a surprisingly simple message: believe that success will come easily to you, and it will. There is one small problem in this proposition which is often overlooked. It is wrong.
The Difference between a Realistic Optimist and an Unrealistic Optimist.
Are you thinking; isn’t optimism a good thing'? Yes. Optimism and the confidence it creates are essential for creating and sustaining the motivation you need to reach your goals. We all know that one of the best predictors of success is whether or not a person believes they will succeed. Belief is the key.
There is an important caveat however. To be successful, you need to understand the vital difference between believing that you will succeed, and believing that you will succeed easily. This is the difference between being a realistic optimist, and an unrealistic optimist.
Make Success Happen
The photo above is from a Simpson Desert trip with 3 vehicles, that my husband Peter, led some years ago. I was fortunate enough to be a participant. To travel safely across the Australian Simpson Desert takes driving and navigation skills, careful planning including decisions such as which route to choose and what survival gear to pack. And of course preparation of the vehicle such as correct tyres, suspension and carriage racks. Even choosing suitable travelling companions and the right time of the year when it is not too hot or wet all play a part. Carrying sufficient petrol, food and water are vital. As is a spade so you can dig you vehicle out of a sand bog as required.
One Sand Dune at a Time
There are over 1000 parallel sand dunes to traverse in a crossing. Before you can cross 1000 you first need to be able to traverse 1 sand dune. Peter and I spent days in the Northern Victoria desert practising driving on deep sand tracks before we attempted 1 sand dune. In 5 days we had to traverse 1140. 1 sand dune at a time. I step at a time.
Big Red
Big Red is the giant of them all. And is 40 metres high. It is the first Dune, in a series of Sand Dunes, running parallel into the Simpson Desert and Munga-Thirri National Park. Not all 4 wheel drive enthusiasts manage to reach the top of Big Red on the first or even second go. Some just don't make it at all. There is an alternative route but that takes extra time and precious fuel.
One of the most difficult aspects is that there are so many wheel ruts and tracks going up the Dune that it can be difficult to traverse as these ruts make it more difficult to gain traction. Especially those created by failed attempts. In this situation it is best to chart your own course. Following the tracks of other drivers who failed is not the way to succeed.
Not all Sand Dunes are equal
Not all sand dunes are equal just as career and life challenges vary. Peter has led 7 trips across the Simpson Desert without serious incident or injury. That is success. Achieved by a realistic optimist. Who prepared, planned and persevered.
Realistic optimists believe they will succeed, but also believe they have to make success happen — through actions like effort, careful planning, persistence, and choosing the right strategies. They also understand the need for giving serious thought to how they will deal with obstacles and setbacks. This preparation increases their confidence in their own ability to get things done as they achieve incremental wins.
Not all Travellers succeed
Unrealistic optimists, on the other hand, believe that success will happen to them — that the universe will reward them for all their positive thinking, or that somehow they will be transformed automatically overnight into the kind of person for whom obstacles cease to exist. Returning to my Simpson Desert example it would be like buying a brand new 4 wheel Drive, packing up and heading off to the desert regions of Australia without undertaking the necessary preparation. For instance acquiring the driving skill to traverse soft shifting sand, the mechanical skill to recognise when your engine is struggling with the load and the heat and the ability to read maps.
Emotional and Strategic Intelligence
Believing that the pathway to success will be rocky, or in this example sandy, leads to greater success because it requires us to employ a blend of emotional and strategic intelligence to achieve success. People who are confident that they will succeed, and understand that success will not come easily, put in more effort, plan how to deal with problems before they arise, and persist longer in the face of difficulty.
Unrealistic optimists are inclined to tell you that you are “being negative” when you express concerns, harbor reservations, or dwell too long on obstacles that stand in the way of your goal. Or again, returning to our Simpson Desert example they might ask you to pack some cartoons of beer in the vehicle when it is already overloaded for the trip. A realistic optimistic leader will acknowledge the person's disappointment but determine that water is the only refreshment necessary for survival. And the risk, to the mechanical operation of the vehicle, is too great to carry the additional refreshments.
You can cultivate your realistic optimism by combining a positive attitude with an honest assessment of the challenges that await you. By all means visualize success and also the actions you will take in order to make success happen. For example visualise traversing your first sand dune but also visualise getting bogged on top of a sand dune and how you are going to get yourself out of that pickle.
Don't forget to pack a shovel.
The Equine (EQ) Link
Equine Experiential Education programs can significantly assist people to tap into their professional development and leaderwork capabilities. We provide experiential exercises with the horses that guide you in how to recognise and draw on your unique strengths and attributes. Equine assisted Team building and Leadership exercises enhance this work. Contact us and explore what your career sand dunes look like.
Dr Deborah Hann
5 March 2024
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